


The Death of a Mother

by RileySFS



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Grief/Mourning, Slight Comedic Relief
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-21
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:01:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24300994
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RileySFS/pseuds/RileySFS
Summary: Victoria Hawke recently lost her mother and has to write a letter to her brother, Carver, the only biological family she now has left, but has trouble with it. She also has to deal with her grief, but she's not alone. Anders sets up a surprise for her to hopefully help her, but will it work, or will a coincidence make it backfire?
Relationships: Anders/Female Hawke





	The Death of a Mother

**Author's Note:**

> This originally stemmed from an OC question:
> 
> **OC Question: Has there ever been a time they’ve needed or wanted help, but didn’t ask for it?**
> 
> **Victoria Hawke:** (Not as familiar with the game as I am with Inquisition, so I apologize if I get some of the details wrong). When Leandra died. They were really close, and she was pretty much all Victoria had left of her biological family. She was having the hardest time writing the letter to Carver, who's now a Grey Warden, but she didn't want to ask anyone for help, let alone Anders. However, when Anders arrives home that evening, only to find out she hadn't left their room all day, he immediately rushes in the room, fearing the worst. Luckily, all he sees is Victoria crying her eyes out at the desk with a blank piece of parchment in front of her. He makes her talk to him and then insists on helping her, for she's done so much for him and his plight already, that it's the least he could do.  
>  **Follow up question:** (Did Carver reply to Victoria's letter, or did she not know how he'd taken the news until they saw eachother again?) uhhh... with what I know of the game, I'd probably say he didn't know how to respond until they saw each other again, but I'm not sure...
> 
> ** TRIGGER WARNING: There is a slight trigger warning because Anders fears Victoria committed suicide, as well as the general topic being about Victoria's grief. If you are ever going through something, my inbox is always open on any of the platforms I am on. Stay safe guys! **

She’s been at this for _hours_ , but hasn’t written a single word. How does she write a letter to her brother, the only biological family she now has left, to tell him about the death of their mother? Especially when it’s as gruesome of a death as Leandra’s was.

She’d locked the door and put up a ward on it before she started this to keep any and all disturbances out, and she knows everyone would be worried about her by now. She doesn’t care. All she cares about is getting this letter written by the time Anders gets home that evening.

Sighing and wiping away the tears that have once again started flowing, Victoria dips her quill in her inkwell and hovers it over the parchment. That’s as far as she gets yet again, for she just can’t seem to even write his _name_.

Meanwhile, Louie is pawing at the door to Victoria and Anders’s bedroom while whining and barking in worry; and many of Victoria’s companions are all pacing worriedly in the main hall while debating what to do.

“I can try to dissolve the ward,” Merrill says.

“I think we should get Blondie,” Varric says. “He’ll know what to do.”

“I agree with the dwarf,” Fenris says.

“Enchantment?” Sandal asks.

“This is one time your enchantments probably won’t work,” Isabela says sadly.

**O0o0o0o**

Anders returns to the Hawke estate in the early evening to find Varric, Fenris, Merrill, and Isabela arguing in the main hall and Louie pawing at the door to his and Victoria’s bedroom, which seems to have some sort of ward around it.

“What’s going on?” he asks everyone, and they immediately stop arguing to look at him in shock.

“Your girlfriend hasn’t been out of your room all day,” Isabela says.

Upon hearing that, Anders immediately fears the worst, and Justice flashes, but he is able to keep the spirit at bay. “You didn’t think to come get me?!” he asks somewhat angrily as he rushes toward the bedroom door. He examines the ward and starts a spell that starts to break it. _I knew I shouldn’t have listened to her this morning_ , he thinks, recalling her telling him that she would be fine and to go to his clinic as usual.

“We did, Blondie,” Varric says as the mage works. “No one could agree on what to do.”

“Maker forbid this from happening again, but don’t hesitate to come get me if there _is_ a next time,” Anders says just before the ward breaks and he tries to open the door, only to realize it is locked. He quickly takes out his key and unlocks it. “Louie, you stay out here.”

The mabari lets out a worried whine before lying down to tell Anders that he will stay there.

With that, Anders rushes in the bedroom, fearing all he would find is a lifeless Victoria somewhere inside. He is immediately relieved when all he sees is Victoria sobbing at her desk with a blank piece of parchment in front of her. He immediately closes the door and rushes toward her.

“Hey, what’s wrong, love?” he asks as he embraces her after taking the quill out of her hand and setting it aside.

Victoria, however, doesn’t seem to have heard that, nor did she seem to realize that he took the quill out of her hand, as she just continues to cry and sob uncontrollably.

Knowing Victoria is just wound up in her grief, Anders uses a levitation spell to carefully bring her to their bed. He cups her face and gently makes her look at him, and he sees how her eyes change as she finally comes back to her senses.

Upon seeing Anders’s worried expression, Victoria just collapses into him and begins to cry and wail uncontrollably again.

Anders instinctively embraces her again, and he pulls her into his lap and positions them so his back is leaning on some pillows against the headrest before starting to rub her back.

“Shh,” he tries to soothe as he rubs her back and slightly rocks them both back and forth. “It’s okay. I’m here. It’s okay.”

They stay like that for several minutes, with Anders whispering soothing words to her and kissing her head throughout it, before Victoria finally calms down enough to shakily tell him everything.

“I can’t do this, Anders!” she says to finish it all off. “I don’t even know where to _start_!” She begins crying again.

“Let me help,” Anders says after a few seconds of rubbing her back and rocking them both back and forth again.

“What?” Victoria asks in shock as she looks up at him with glassy eyes. “I can’t ask you to do that.”

“I love you,” Anders replies. “It’s the least I could do.”

It takes a little convincing, but Victoria eventually relents.

“Okay,” she says with a sigh and a nod. Her stomach suddenly growls quite loudly, but she pays it no mind.

Anders, however, instantly becomes worried again.

“When was the last time you had anything to eat, love?” he asks her.

“I honestly don’t know,” Victoria replies with another sigh. “I’ve lost track of time, to be honest.”

At that, Anders knows that he very likely will not be leaving her side for a while, and he immediately sends out a magical signal for one of her companions, which is quickly answered.

“Yes?” Merrill asks as she sticks her head in the door.

“Could you maybe have someone bring us some food?” Anders asks as he rubs Victoria’s back soothingly.

“Oh, of course,” Merrill replies. “Is she…?”

“I’ll be fine,” Victoria says shakily. “Maybe.”

Upon hearing his master’s voice, Louie bolts from his spot near the door, into the room, and onto the bed. He starts sniffing her before laying down and placing his head on her legs.

Victoria smiles slightly as she begins petting the mabari before quickly losing the energy to keep up the petting, and resorts to just keeping her hand on his head.

Anders looks at Merrill as Victoria’s stomach growls again. “Are you just going to stand there, or…?”

“Oh, right, my apologies!” Merrill says. “You’ll have food before you know it!” With that, she closes the door.

Soon after Victoria has eaten, she falls asleep in Anders’s arms and lap, so he decides to wait until the next day to write the letter to Carver. He gently and carefully repositions her on her side of the bed before blowing out the candelabras with his magic and going to bed himself.

**O0o0o0o**

During the night, Anders wakes up to Victoria having a nightmare, just as he had the night before, and immediately bolts into action. After relighting a few of the candelabras to give him some light, he quickly straddles her and holds her arms down with his hands while sending tiny electrical pulses to try to get her to wake up. However, it doesn’t seem to be working as it did the night before, as Victoria just continues to thrash around and mutter in her sleep.

“Victoria, wake up!” Anders says as he starts to shake her.

It doesn’t work.

Becoming desperate, for he knows it can be bad if he can’t get her to wake up soon, Anders slaps the side of her face pretty hard.

Victoria immediately wakes up upon contact, and Anders breathes a sigh of relief.

When Victoria finally becomes aware of her surroundings, she looks at the mage above her and feels the side of her face.

“D—did you… _hit_ me?” she asks somewhat breathlessly.

Anders sighs. “I’m sorry, love. I couldn’t get you to wake up otherwise.” He places his hand on her face and summons his healing magic. “Better?” he asks once he finishes the spell.

“I… suppose…” Victoria mutters.

Upon hearing that, Anders realizes Victoria is not doing well mentally, and he immediately brings her into his lap again. Louie jumps back on the bed after Anders had made him get off to wake her, and lays his head on her leg while looking at her with a worried expression on his face, just like he had earlier that night. However, she pays him no mind, which worries Anders even more.

“Talk to me, love,” he tells her softly.

“I’d rather not,” Victoria mutters, but leans into his embrace nonetheless.

“Please?” Anders asks.

Victoria sighs. “Fine. It’s just… hard.” She starts crying again.

“I know, love,” Anders says as he tightens his embrace and starts rubbing her back soothingly again. “I’m here for you.”

Victoria doesn’t say anything for a while. Instead, she just continues to cry in his arms.

After several minutes, Victoria’s cries have settled down mostly, the occasional shiver or whimper the only indication she is still awake. Then, finally, she slowly and shakily starts to let it all loose.

“I—I keep s—seeing that a—abomination th—that man c—created,” she mutters. “H—how h—he was g—going to…” she trails off, not able to continue any further, and starts crying uncontrollably again.

Anders tightens his embrace on her and whispers soothing words to her softly.

Louie, meanwhile, stands up and starts to carefully lick at her tears. He may not know exactly what is going on, but he hates seeing his master like this.

Anders, however, makes the mabari stop when he realizes Victoria has turned her face away from him. The mabari lets out a worried whine before he lays back down and returns his head to rest on her leg.

After several more minutes, Victoria falls asleep in Anders’s arms again, but just as he’s about to carefully lay her down on her side of the bed, he realizes she is having another nightmare. He quickly starts shaking her, and that wakes her almost immediately.

When Victoria realizes what just happened, she asks him to put a sleeping spell on her to prevent any further nightmares, and that she’s currently too tired to talk much further. He quickly obliges her, knowing she must truly be suffering if she asks him to do something she usually hates, then carefully positions her on her side of the bed before embracing her again, and soon falls asleep like that.

**O0o0o0o**

The next morning, after they have eaten, Anders helps Victoria write the letter to Carver and they have a raven send it off before Anders turns to her.

“I have a surprise for you, love,” he tells her as they are walking back in the estate.

Victoria sighs. “I’m not in the mood, Anders,” she says vacantly, her mind clearly elsewhere.

“I think you’ll change your mind once you see it,” Anders replies as he starts to lead her to the basement that he uses as a shortcut to get to his clinic faster.

When Victoria realizes this, she stops. “Anders, where are you taking me? I don’t have my staff on me!”

“No farther than this, love,” he tells her before giving her a quick kiss on the lips. “Wait here.” With that, he leaves the estate through the basement door.

After a few minutes, the basement door opens again and Anders walks back in with two people behind him. Victoria immediately recognizes the child as one of the patients she healed in Anders’s clinic the last time she was there, but the man she doesn’t recognize. She assumes he is the child’s father, since it was her mother who was with her when she was healed.

“Abigail!” Victoria says in shock as the girl starts running toward her with a small bouquet of wildflowers and she crouches down. “What are you doing here?”

Abigail hugs her before handing her the flowers. “These are for you.”

As she takes the flowers and thanks her, Victoria can see evidence that the girl was recently crying, and she instantly becomes worried. She looks up at Anders before turning to the other man.

“She wanted to thank you for healing her,” the man says. “After losing her mother soon after you healed her…”

“I’m sorry, what?” Victoria asks in shock, effectively cutting him off. “Did you just say she lost her mother s—soon after I h—healed her?” She has to use all of her strength not to break down as the man nods and she turns back to Abigail to see her crying. She hopes her mother wasn’t another one of that monster’s victims as she reaches up to wipe away Abigail’s tears. “I’m so sorry about your mother, Abigail,” she tells her sadly. “I…” She sighs. “I recently lost mine as well.”

This catches the man’s attention, and as Abigail hugs Victoria again, he looks between them and Anders. “ _Please_ don’t tell me she was another one of that monster’s victims,” he mutters.

Upon hearing that, Victoria loses her footing and falls on her behind while still hugging Abigail. The ensuing silence that follows is all the man needs to confirm his fears.

“Shit,” he mutters under his breath.

“ _Daddy_!” Abigail says with a gasp as she stops hugging Victoria and turns toward her father. “You owe me a copper!” She holds her hand out expectantly.

As the man grumbles and reaches in his pocket to get the coin, Anders and Victoria both burst out laughing.

“You’re raising her right,” Victoria says through her laughter.

“I swear she has the hearing of an elf sometimes,” the man grumbles as he places the coin in his daughter’s hand.

Abigail immediately tries to give the coin to Victoria. “Here.”

“Oh, no, I can’t take that!” Victoria protests. “You should save it to buy yourself something nice later.”

“I want my Mommy back!” Abigail whines.

The man sighs. “She’s been like this ever since we heard the news,” he mutters. “I was hoping seeing you again would help, but, clearly, I was mistaken.”

“She’s not the only one,” Victoria mutters as she stands up. “I’m just glad she didn’t see the abomination that monster created. I still can’t get the image out of my head.” Her voice cracks at the last few words, and she sighs. “Excuse me.” With that, she goes back into the estate.

When the door closes behind Victoria, Anders sighs, apologizes to Abigail and her father, leads them out of the basement, before rushing to make sure Victoria is alright.

Meanwhile, when Victoria closes the door behind her, she is already in tears. She places the wildflowers Abigail had given her in a vase that already has some other flowers in it before going to her room and closing the door. She then flops on the bed before fully losing her composure.

She doesn’t know how long she is like this before she feels herself being magically lifted and placed in Anders’s lap, just like the night before. She can hear Anders whisper soothing words to her, but she is so wound up in her grief that she just barely understands what he’s saying.

**O0o0o0o**

After about a week of barely doing anything but crying her eyes out, Victoria realizes that she needs to get back to work. She starts by helping Anders in his clinic, and then slowly starts to do more, reestablishing her presence in all of Kirkwall.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you everyone for reading/bookmarking this, as well as for leaving comments/kudos! Y'all are the best! Maker and Creators guide you all!
> 
> I just realized this is the first of several one-shots named "The Death of a ___" that I have posted. When I came up with the title of the first one I started writing (which was not this one), I did have the song, "The Death of a Bachelor" by Panic! at the Disco stuck in my head lol. 
> 
> If you would like to learn more about Victoria, here is her OC page on the fandom wiki I created:  
> https://my-dragon-age-canon-worldstate.fandom.com/wiki/Victoria_Hawke
> 
> Stay safe during this pandemic! Love you all!


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